The Funeral

Every time I die to myself I learn the power of life. Death is neither a life threatening experience nor life’s nemesis nor opposite. It’s a supreme gift. When I learn to die, I learn to exist. I expand the possibilities of my being. I experience the “small death” when I am in abstinence. When I choose to renounce. When I choose to have faith and remain still, without chasing pleasure and excitement. When I choose to be void. To be in absence. To fast. I learn my capacity of being beyond life. Every funeral is a celebration of my own essence, in which my soul can rejoice and restart, reset and yet continue. I am a non-linear presence. I am discontinuous yet evergreen. I can perish and still be alive: I can be fully active but choose to remain adamant; I can die but choose to still move forward. Faith, is the fuel for both. It’s the recognition of my own light, of my own nothingness and fullness – of my own space beyond time.

I learn. – Every occasion I am ready for the funeral-

I will find my will to be stronger, my Faith to be my foundation.

I trust.

That all that is mine will be mine.

The essential only.

The excess solely creates anxiety in me, it forces me to carry something my energy doesn’t require. I don’t need everything.

Therefore I die. I die to sex, I die to food, I die to relationships, I die to life itself. To be more alive than I ever was.

 

In this process. What wasn’t for me

will be shaved away

and all that is mine will be mine.

 

At the end of all times I will be me.

 

Erica

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